It's been forever since I last posted and there are a number of things to add.
I ran the City to Bay in September. I was aiming to finish the 12 km in 72 minutes but didn't make it, getting in at 74 minutes instead. That was my best time, so I was still happy. Dave did the run too and struggled a bit since he'd only arrived back from the UK a few days earlier.
In November I had another blood test to check the reproductive hormones. I also had my regular checkup blood test and went to see Dr Giri. As usual, I waited for around half an hour before my five minute appointment. I got the all clear lymphoma-wise and then Dr Giri said the hormone results indicated that my ovaries have failed and therefore I need a course of action as if I were a lady in my 50s. He wrote out a special little Royal Adelaide Hospital card to handball me on to the Women's Health Centre.
On Monday this week my appointment at the Women's Health Centre arrived. Once again I waited for about half an hour before being ushered into the doctor's room. He didn't really know why I was there and although he had my file, which I felt was quite organised for the hospital, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do for me. I replied that I didn't know either, I'd just been sent from haematology because my ovaries weren't working after chemo. He said my chances of having any more children is zero and eventually wrote out a prescription for hormone replacement therapy. I am hoping it doesn't take too long for things to get sorted out once I start taking the tablets because it'd be nice to be free of hot flushes and other pesky symptoms.
That's about all as far as a health update goes. In other news, I have been able to get my other blog printed in a book and it arrived today. I'm glad to have it in hard copy. I'm not quite sure why really, because it's a bit weird to have a book to remind me of what wasn't a particularly pleasant time.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Antihistamines and September
I went to see the GP and she said that it was a bit early to say for sure, from one blood test, that I had ovarian failure. She told me to wait a couple of months and then have another blood test, so in October I'll have the test again and we shall see what comes back.
In the meantime, I have to put up with hot flushes, although they have reduced a bit. I asked the doctor about my itchy eyes while I was there and she thought they were due to allergies and told me to get some antihistamines. I dutifully went to the chemist and purchased some antihistamine nasal spray. It seems to have done the trick.
September is another important month of anniversaries. It was Father's Day in 2009 when I first felt the lump in my neck. It's a bit crazy for me to think that was two years ago already. The City to Bay falls in September - in 2009 I ran it with lymphoma, in 2010 I ran it after chemo and this year I will be running it in better condition than the past couple of years. I hope my time is better than those two because I'll be fairly disappointed if I can't stumble across the line faster in good health. Although I am a menopausal nanna at the moment so that may lead to another slow time.
It was also September last year when I went into hospital for the surgeon to have a little look inside my chest and take a sample. It was the Thursday after the City to Bay when I spoke to Dr Giri on the way home from the hospital and he said the lab analysis was clear and I was in remission. I might think of a special way to celebrate that on Thursday week.
In the meantime, I have to put up with hot flushes, although they have reduced a bit. I asked the doctor about my itchy eyes while I was there and she thought they were due to allergies and told me to get some antihistamines. I dutifully went to the chemist and purchased some antihistamine nasal spray. It seems to have done the trick.
September is another important month of anniversaries. It was Father's Day in 2009 when I first felt the lump in my neck. It's a bit crazy for me to think that was two years ago already. The City to Bay falls in September - in 2009 I ran it with lymphoma, in 2010 I ran it after chemo and this year I will be running it in better condition than the past couple of years. I hope my time is better than those two because I'll be fairly disappointed if I can't stumble across the line faster in good health. Although I am a menopausal nanna at the moment so that may lead to another slow time.
It was also September last year when I went into hospital for the surgeon to have a little look inside my chest and take a sample. It was the Thursday after the City to Bay when I spoke to Dr Giri on the way home from the hospital and he said the lab analysis was clear and I was in remission. I might think of a special way to celebrate that on Thursday week.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Obla-di obla-da life goes on...
The results of my blood test are consistent with ovarian failure. The chemo has screwed them up. So that means I'm experiencing early menopause. It's not nice. I don't have too many horrid symptoms but the hot flushes are pretty crap. I'm going to see my GP tomorrow to find out a bit more and see what, if anything, can be done.
I haven't really been thinking about it too much, but when I do pause to reflect I (as is often the case) am divided. On one hand, I don't mind. I have two children, I have reproduced. The ovaries have served their purpose. Their demise is just another part of the strange land of lymphoma I never planned to live in. On the other, however, I mourn the loss of those tiny kidney shaped organs. There was a possibility we may have attempted a third child but that is no longer an option. My body is letting me down again and it's sad and annoying.
I have read some forums and reports of people who go through a period of ovarian failure but then they somehow right themselves and start to function again. It's early days, so we shall see what happens in my case.
Other than that, I intend to run the corporate cup tomorrow. The last corporate cup run I remember doing was mid September 2009 and I had a wonky turn after it - it was an indication that all was not well and I went to the doctors. I'm not sure if I did any more corporate cup runs after that, it's all a bit of a blur. Six weeks later I was diagnosed.
Anyway, life does indeed go on.
I haven't really been thinking about it too much, but when I do pause to reflect I (as is often the case) am divided. On one hand, I don't mind. I have two children, I have reproduced. The ovaries have served their purpose. Their demise is just another part of the strange land of lymphoma I never planned to live in. On the other, however, I mourn the loss of those tiny kidney shaped organs. There was a possibility we may have attempted a third child but that is no longer an option. My body is letting me down again and it's sad and annoying.
I have read some forums and reports of people who go through a period of ovarian failure but then they somehow right themselves and start to function again. It's early days, so we shall see what happens in my case.
Other than that, I intend to run the corporate cup tomorrow. The last corporate cup run I remember doing was mid September 2009 and I had a wonky turn after it - it was an indication that all was not well and I went to the doctors. I'm not sure if I did any more corporate cup runs after that, it's all a bit of a blur. Six weeks later I was diagnosed.
Anyway, life does indeed go on.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Hot flushes
I've been to see Dr Giri again for yet another check-up. I should just get used to it because they're not going to end anytime soon.
My blood test was all clear and normal, so that was nice. I did have something to ask him about though....I've been having hot flushes and wondered what it might be. He told me that it may be due to ovarian failure causing early onset menopause. Excellent. I did know that there was a chance that may happen but hadn't thought much about it. I definitely hadn't thought of actually experiencing hot flushes. I've had nanna-ish tendencies for a long time and this may be just another example of how that plays out physically.
Dr Giri sent me off to get a blood test and I'm waiting to find out what the result shows. I don't think I'm too fussed, I just would like to know what's going on. I would like to not have hot flushes though, because they are pretty annoying.
I don't think about my treatment much but when I was heading up to level 7 of the east wing the other day I realised how familiar and habitual it felt. I had to go up there a lot and it's not good to have to go into a hospital that much, unless you work there. Even though things have moved along and life has mostly found a new normal, that time and its wider repercussions still hang close to me.
Other than health issues, things have been trundling along in our household. It was my birthday yesterday and I had a lovely day. We enjoyed a tasty family brunchy/lunchy deliciousness and then then girls stayed overnight with Dave's sister while we went to the cinema, had dinner together, slept without interruption and had a peaceful breakfast.
My blood test was all clear and normal, so that was nice. I did have something to ask him about though....I've been having hot flushes and wondered what it might be. He told me that it may be due to ovarian failure causing early onset menopause. Excellent. I did know that there was a chance that may happen but hadn't thought much about it. I definitely hadn't thought of actually experiencing hot flushes. I've had nanna-ish tendencies for a long time and this may be just another example of how that plays out physically.
Dr Giri sent me off to get a blood test and I'm waiting to find out what the result shows. I don't think I'm too fussed, I just would like to know what's going on. I would like to not have hot flushes though, because they are pretty annoying.
I don't think about my treatment much but when I was heading up to level 7 of the east wing the other day I realised how familiar and habitual it felt. I had to go up there a lot and it's not good to have to go into a hospital that much, unless you work there. Even though things have moved along and life has mostly found a new normal, that time and its wider repercussions still hang close to me.
Other than health issues, things have been trundling along in our household. It was my birthday yesterday and I had a lovely day. We enjoyed a tasty family brunchy/lunchy deliciousness and then then girls stayed overnight with Dave's sister while we went to the cinema, had dinner together, slept without interruption and had a peaceful breakfast.
Monday, June 27, 2011
The verdict
It's been a long time coming but the latest news is that the 'most likely' from the last post was spot on.
I saw Dr Giri on June 3rd and he told me the scan came back with everything the same size and my blood results were 'perfect'. I was quite relieved. The next scan is in a year's time but I'll have a blood test and see the doctor in a couple of months.
Generally I feel well and mostly have enough energy. I still occasionally get days of fatigue but it is not as bad now. Whereas before I could hardly get off the couch on the worst days, now I can function through the day but it's really hard work to just do the basics such as get breakfast ready.
Most things in my body are back to the way they were. My weight has just snuck under 70kgs, a few armpit hairs have returned and the only thing that's still a bit strange are my eyes which sting and are itchy more than they used to be.
I have started training for the City to Bay and hope to finish the 12k run in 72 minutes this year, we'll see how it goes because I'm not sure I'll be able to haul myself out of bed for training when it's so cold.
I'm cooking for a uni conference next week and am looking forward to a few days away busting my guts in a kitchen for a change. Other than that, our family has been pretty busy and we just try to keep our heads above water.
I saw Dr Giri on June 3rd and he told me the scan came back with everything the same size and my blood results were 'perfect'. I was quite relieved. The next scan is in a year's time but I'll have a blood test and see the doctor in a couple of months.
Generally I feel well and mostly have enough energy. I still occasionally get days of fatigue but it is not as bad now. Whereas before I could hardly get off the couch on the worst days, now I can function through the day but it's really hard work to just do the basics such as get breakfast ready.
Most things in my body are back to the way they were. My weight has just snuck under 70kgs, a few armpit hairs have returned and the only thing that's still a bit strange are my eyes which sting and are itchy more than they used to be.
I have started training for the City to Bay and hope to finish the 12k run in 72 minutes this year, we'll see how it goes because I'm not sure I'll be able to haul myself out of bed for training when it's so cold.
I'm cooking for a uni conference next week and am looking forward to a few days away busting my guts in a kitchen for a change. Other than that, our family has been pretty busy and we just try to keep our heads above water.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
What's the worst that could happen?
I had a CT scan on Sunday and is commonly the case, I have been in two minds about the whole thing.
On the one hand, I am fine about having a scan. I don't mind drinking the barium solution anymore, I know what's going to happen in the test and it doesn't worry me. Half the time I am also not too worried about the outcome of the scan. Whatever is going on in there, I can't do anything to change it, so I'm not stressing about it.
But.....I am very aware of every little niggle and twinge I feel inside, wondering if it's something normal or something sinister. These thoughts serve a purpose because if Dr Giri gives me some less than favourable news, I will be partly prepared. Even with these occasional thoughts, I am not freaking out. I am not letting myself get carried away by the worry.
As my psychologist once asked me about worries - "What's the worst that could happen?"
Ummm, I could die a long and painful death. The long and painful part would be crap, but is not insurmountable and the death would be sad but heaven would make it all okay. I'm not keen for things to go this way, but I'm preparing myself just in case.
The rest of the exercise is "What's the best that could happen?" followed by "What's most likely?"
The best would be that Dr Giri says with 100% certainty that I'll never get anything related to lymphoma for the rest of my life and that I never have to have another scan or visit him. Not that I don't like Dr Giri, but if I never had to have another appointment again, I wouldn't miss him.
Most likely - there's no change and everything is okay and I'll just have to revisit it all again in another three months.
And with that, the worry is supposed to be dealt with and not cause any further distress......
On the one hand, I am fine about having a scan. I don't mind drinking the barium solution anymore, I know what's going to happen in the test and it doesn't worry me. Half the time I am also not too worried about the outcome of the scan. Whatever is going on in there, I can't do anything to change it, so I'm not stressing about it.
But.....I am very aware of every little niggle and twinge I feel inside, wondering if it's something normal or something sinister. These thoughts serve a purpose because if Dr Giri gives me some less than favourable news, I will be partly prepared. Even with these occasional thoughts, I am not freaking out. I am not letting myself get carried away by the worry.
As my psychologist once asked me about worries - "What's the worst that could happen?"
Ummm, I could die a long and painful death. The long and painful part would be crap, but is not insurmountable and the death would be sad but heaven would make it all okay. I'm not keen for things to go this way, but I'm preparing myself just in case.
The rest of the exercise is "What's the best that could happen?" followed by "What's most likely?"
The best would be that Dr Giri says with 100% certainty that I'll never get anything related to lymphoma for the rest of my life and that I never have to have another scan or visit him. Not that I don't like Dr Giri, but if I never had to have another appointment again, I wouldn't miss him.
Most likely - there's no change and everything is okay and I'll just have to revisit it all again in another three months.
And with that, the worry is supposed to be dealt with and not cause any further distress......
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Happy anniversary!
I have been struggling to get to post a blog, but also struggling to think of things that are worth putting in. A friend of mine summed it up well by telling me it's not as interesting as the other blog because I'm not dying anymore. There is definitely an element of that. I also don't have as much to record for myself so it just doesn't get done. Another significant factor is that I spend much less time zonked on the couch these days, which is good news.
There have been a couple of milestones lately though which are worth recording. On May 4th I celebrated the one year anniversary of my last IV treatment. To mark the occasion Dave and I had Lemon Delicious for dessert, something we had a bit too much of during treatment days. It was extra special because it was made with the first lemon from our tree. Still as tasty as ever. On May 10th it was the one year anniversary of my last pills. So it's been a full year since I finished treatment. I am feeling pretty good. I rarely have days where I struggle with fatigue now and when I do it is a bit easier to push through and keep up with normal activities.
I am scheduled to have a CT scan on 22nd May and then see Dr Giri in early June. I'm not nervous about it. I can't change whatever the result is so I'll just wait and see. I do hope that they find nothing untoward but if there is something I'll just take it as it comes.
I've been spending time at OzWater conference this week. It's an annual conference organised by the Australian Water Association. I learnt quite a bit, ate some good food, caught up with a few people, got a couple of free pens. It's all a bit crazy though and I'm not entirely sure where I fit in this industry/profession of mine. There were people in suits everywhere and people talking on mobile phones everywhere. I'm fairly sure I don't care enough to dress-up everyday and spend ages on my mobile as if things will fall apart without me. I enjoyed the conference and I always enjoy learning things and listening to presentations but I don't think the high-flying corporate world is for me.
Tomorrow I will be remembering and farewelling a man who taught me a great deal. It's my Grandad's funeral in the afternoon - he died on Saturday after struggling with his failing health for quite a while. It's extra sad for me because he was my last grandparent. There was a time when one of my greatest fears was for one of them to die and now all four are no longer with us.
I looked up the notice about Grandad in the paper and near it there was almost a whole column taken up for a girl who had died and she was 19. I'm fairly sure it said she had lymphoma. I didn't dwell on it for long but I did have the thought that I was glad my name was not in there yet. But I was sad for her family because it's really crap when someone dies.
There have been a couple of milestones lately though which are worth recording. On May 4th I celebrated the one year anniversary of my last IV treatment. To mark the occasion Dave and I had Lemon Delicious for dessert, something we had a bit too much of during treatment days. It was extra special because it was made with the first lemon from our tree. Still as tasty as ever. On May 10th it was the one year anniversary of my last pills. So it's been a full year since I finished treatment. I am feeling pretty good. I rarely have days where I struggle with fatigue now and when I do it is a bit easier to push through and keep up with normal activities.
I am scheduled to have a CT scan on 22nd May and then see Dr Giri in early June. I'm not nervous about it. I can't change whatever the result is so I'll just wait and see. I do hope that they find nothing untoward but if there is something I'll just take it as it comes.
I've been spending time at OzWater conference this week. It's an annual conference organised by the Australian Water Association. I learnt quite a bit, ate some good food, caught up with a few people, got a couple of free pens. It's all a bit crazy though and I'm not entirely sure where I fit in this industry/profession of mine. There were people in suits everywhere and people talking on mobile phones everywhere. I'm fairly sure I don't care enough to dress-up everyday and spend ages on my mobile as if things will fall apart without me. I enjoyed the conference and I always enjoy learning things and listening to presentations but I don't think the high-flying corporate world is for me.
Tomorrow I will be remembering and farewelling a man who taught me a great deal. It's my Grandad's funeral in the afternoon - he died on Saturday after struggling with his failing health for quite a while. It's extra sad for me because he was my last grandparent. There was a time when one of my greatest fears was for one of them to die and now all four are no longer with us.
I looked up the notice about Grandad in the paper and near it there was almost a whole column taken up for a girl who had died and she was 19. I'm fairly sure it said she had lymphoma. I didn't dwell on it for long but I did have the thought that I was glad my name was not in there yet. But I was sad for her family because it's really crap when someone dies.
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